It was during Celebrations. I don’t remember how old I was, maybe in my early twenties. I remember being very insecure and feeling that Guru outwardly didn’t give me enough attention and felt a little bit like Guru loved other people more than me because he didn’t talk to me. I felt insecure and down and a little bit unloved or not loved enough. Guru loves everyone else more than me, that is how I felt. I remember it went on for quite a few days. My mind was very strong. I was really down for a few days.
One day out of the blue, Guru calls me up and without really saying anything gives me a little gift bag. And we have a photo of it. It’s a blue gift bag, that’s right. In the gift bag was a little stuffed animal or something. But the most precious thing was that Guru wrote on the gift bag, it’s very faint, He wrote, “My dearest Aruna,” and then is the printed “I love you,” and then underneath Guru writes, “Guru.”
Guru didn’t say anything. He just gave it to me, and it just blew me away. I was so happy and also at the same time I felt so stupid for feeling for days before that Guru didn’t love me, or ignored me or didn’t pay attention to me. It just made me realise – and it still counts today – Guru always knows everything and He loves us infinitely no matter what happens outwardly. But He knows everything inwardly. The love is always there, boundless. This gift bag is also one of my great treasures because it just shows Guru’s infinite love not just for me, but for all his children, all of his spiritual children, his love, his boundless love.
When the Master comes to me,
He never forgets to bring
His all-seeing eye
And His all-loving heart.
Sri Chinmoy 1